Meditation Musings

So, in OA we do meditation times and I was in the Meditation meeting and had an interesting experience. I've been feeling lonely, left out, and unsure of my past or my future. Well, as the guided meditation passed, there was some time, after dropping a few things in the God Box, that we had to ourselves, between us and God. I was still feeling the loneliness and the wonder, and had dropped a few things off in the God Box about what had been going on in my mind the past few days. I went and sat on the beach as the leader mentioned, letting the sand of the beach we were at get into my shorts swimsuit, when I felt God in his/her (very much androgynous) presence. We talked for a bit about what had been going on, and then I got challenged to enter the water. I followed God into the water, letting myself feel the sand, the pain of stepping on shells, I went in shallow at first, just God and I, but then dared to go deeper, even looking underneath the water. (Water typically = trouble for me). I saw the beauty underneath the scary waves and as I went to the point where I could not touch bottom and clung to God like an anxious little kid, God showed me the friends, in the form of dolphins. I saw nicola, devyn, ron, chris, madeline, jenny, val, and others. It helped me not feel so alone and writing this is helping to break more isolation again. The meditation was perfect for what I needed and I hope to get to do that more often, even if it means getting up earlier to do it.